Funny dad stories

[fluffy]

looking at the gallery photos with Jim and Jane it just occurred to me how bizzarre it must be to have Jim for a dad...................ok they won't see it like that .....he'll just be dad to Jane......but we've all got embarrassing dad stories.............
mine i confess is the usual 'dancing dad' story....i was 12 pretending to be 16 on holiday in Marbella......2 Glaswegian blokes were chatting me up and i was reveling in the attention..........however mum and dad were strutting their 'funky stuff' on the dancefloor...dad looking like a funky chicken.........
well, the blokes started chuckling to themselves re dad's dancing......i was cringing then dad spotted them and like the pack leader rounded on the two blokes and sent them packing.............i was mortified..........
Of course now i'd have told them to bugger off...that's my dad!!!.....and joined him in the chicken dance............lol

I did read once that when Jane had friends round to watch a scary movie Jim hid behind the sofa and frightened them with a scary voice........ ......I reckon if i were Jane i'd be trying to outdo him in all the practical jokes ......................

fluffy

so what are your funny dad stories??......

[quirky]

This is SO NOT politically correct. My dad was a very nice man and sometimes REALLY funny.

In the US and maybe in other countries, we have a history of sometimes classifying people with terms that are insulting. We all know these terms and the history behind them and my dad certainly was never one to use them, and taught his kids to be respectful. I, for instance, am a honky wasp cracker. And I'm not mad about it. Anyway,

We were playing Balderdash one day and it was my turn to be the "dasher". For those not familiar with the rules: Balderdash is a board game where you try to come up with definitions for obscure words, which are given to you. If you are NOT the dasher (and there are usually three or more people who are NOT the dasher) you make up a definition that others might find believable. If you are the dasher, you must read the definitions others have given you AND the correct definition and then people guess the correct definition out of the batch. You get points if no one picks the correct definition.

Anyway, the word was "qwop".

Everyone starts writing and I notice that my dad is turning beet red. And I think, "Oh...no...what is he brewing up."

By the time the definitions are passed to me, he has tears escaping from his twinkly eyes and is starting to chuckle.

I read through all the definitions, and come to his.

He has written: "A gay Italian immigrant."

Thinking back, it still slays me. And I hope I haven't offended anyone by relating it.

[quirky]

I don't know how many times I tried to read his definition and went..."A guh...ahahahahaha... a guh.....ahahahahah." I was just looking at him and we were both crying with laughter.

When I finally guh-got it out, the whole table dissolved into hysterics.

[Canadian Jayne]

My dad liked to drink alot, he'd often come home or be enebriated.
My mom was usually pretty calm generallya and just accepted his
behavior but really didn't like it finally she got fed up (when a volcano erupts it really flows)
I remember this day so clearly.......
she said something like..." You want a beer, hear you go"
she proceeded to pour in over his head.. we stood there stunned.
That wasn't a usual mom thing to do often she'd wait hours outside
for my dad to come out of the hotel. Note: this was many years ago
when men had their own entrance door.
Anyway.. the beer flowed and flowed.
Then my dad started to laugh, it had sobered him up and we all started
to laugh and we even took a picture, I sometimes look at the picture and have the laugh all over again.

[fluffy]

this is really embarrasing but funny...................

when i was about 4 i recall seeing dad wandering around in his y fronts........ .........and being a curious 4 year old i pointed at his 'bits' and said what's that??.............my mum told me it was where he kept his spare change.......

cue a couple of weeks later in the supermarket.....i saw a sweet or something i wanted, and my little hand shot right to dad's 'bits' whereupon i grabbed as hard as i could..............lol

A writhing father screamed....'why did you do that'?......i of course replied, 'i wanted some money'...... .............

the moral of that story is NEVER wear Y fronts.......you never know who might want your cash.........

fluffy

[Canadian Jayne]

I can hardly contain myself at the library!